inactive blog for the win!

We need to pray for the world.
Now, more than ever.

OHAI THERE!

Ooh, seems like I've not be on blogger in awhile. Heh.
Few thoughts recently:

• 1. She seems so happy (no, this ain't referring to me)
• 2. Are the holidays coming yet? *whistles*
• 3. I wanna buy a digital piano and a instant photo printer! Instant photo printer can save me tonnes of dollahhs in the long run, methinks. Quite a worthy investment.
  
• 4. How long is an electric guitar?
• 5. Why can't I download HP and the chamber of secrets? That was totally the best HP movie ever!
• 6. It has been awhile since I watched a horror flick.
  
• 7. I haven't finished watching Bollywood Slumdog millionaire! (Can you believe I typed Bollywood millionaire? Then after 5 seconds I thought it sounded wrong lol)
• 8. Petch keeps blogging about soccer.
• 9. I wanna have cookies and cream ice cream!
• 10. I hate probability!!!!!!! What is the probability that probability will come out tomorrow? 1. T___T
  

This has got to be the most random post ever~~
By the way my favourite colour is still green.

Moving back to LJ

Blogger needs to have a f-list system.

Shape up or ship out.

“You know why I've started to study, though not entirely?
Because I’m desperate now, more than ever
If I don't get promoted this year, i wont have a life
I'll be shipped off to army and be left in the lower echelons of society for life

Your determination is driven by what you want in life, your lack of action is driven by your lack of desperation.
So, what's the last straw for you?

Even now, I'm not studying much because i keep thinking promos will help me.
But at least I'm a bit desperate now
Are you?

What you want and what you will be denied must be differentiated and compartmentalized so that you will be receptive to them
I'm starting to feel the denial i will receive if i fail.
You have to recognize it, and accept it, and act. "

“What you want: money
What you will be denied: money

Same thing but, sometimes people fail to recognize the negative part of it. we keep fantasizing about the positives and the possible denials become a peripheral blur.

I think it's important to be aware and alert of the denial we shall receive upon failure, so as to even begin acting against failure.

Put the two into different drawers, see the starkness. recognize the possibilities, not the possibility.

Well I'm tired now so my explanation isn't tip top."

Looks like someone paid attention during Pre-U sem, hmm?
But the difference, Thias, is that you know.
What is it exactly that you want.

And it's not fair. You always do.

IMAGE INTENSIVE KTHXBAI.

^ CANNOT STAND IT LESTER LOOKS DAMN TALL IN THIS SHOT.

Why can't blogger have a lj-cut like function? Then I can put all the photos under the cut. Zzzz. Anyway I had fun, but I really gotta get my butt down to studying ):

I'm still praying for you ;)

Friends are wonderful creatures.

" when you're down and troubled
and you need some loving care
and nothing, nothing is going right
close your eyes and think of me
and soon i will be there
to brighten up even your darkest night

you just call out my name
and you know wherever i am
i'll come running to see you again
winter, spring, summer or fall
all you have to do is call
and i'll be there
you've got a friend

if the sky above you
grows dark and full of clouds
and that old north wind begins to blow
keep your head together
and call my name out loud
soon you'll hear me knocking at your door"

Today was a really good day. Well I kind-of expected things to be really bad with me today, with the worry and all. Initially at morning worship I just wanted to be alone.. to just have that solitude and just pray, yknow? But Sammie saw me, I think she was concerned, and she came to join me. She knows what's going on and she prayed for me and I felt really good after worship. (: Thank you my love. Samuel said something that really struck me though.. " Everyday we wake up thinking 'it's yet another day..', but if not, then where would we be?" I thought that was really deep, lol. Maybe we should all really stop taking every day for granted. You never know how much time you have left.

The rest of school was okay I suppose. I didn't really feel like talking today but with such concerned and coolios friends around, how not to? They really helped to get my mind off things and I'm very thankful for them. Brens, Alexia, Meiting, Max.. Oh! I went for econs consultation today! I think I understand the tutorial more now so I am happy. (:

After school went to subway with Meiting Chesed and Victor. It was awesome! Awesome company, awesome food at awesome prices, awesome conversations. We talked about the weirdest things, seriously. About our childhood, then it lead to science (?!), then specifically to physics (photoelectric effect, relativity and time freeze), then to Tim foo (lol!) and then to disney.. Oh we also saw this really.. interesting dude in the 163 bus queue. Let's just say the afro dude.. attracted our attention. For more reasons other than his hair ;D

Had the FIRST video call in my life in the night (omg phailz). But my laptop sucks and I STILL CANNOT FIGURE WHERE THE MIC IS LOCATED AT. But still. It was quite funny because chesed was saying ' oh poor you, you have to type everything out..' I is going to get my headset tomorrows! D< After that had a webcam session with Toon! Awesomes to the maxest, seriously.

All in all I'm just really glad to have these people around. I love all of you, and thank you for standing by me today (: And hey, I'm always here too, okay?

x, Audrey.
photo credited to fringuellina on flickr!

This is insanely creepy.
I got goosebumps after watching this!
(you need to watch the whole video to know what I mean by CREEEEEEEEEEPY!)

But boy is he talented (?)

Happy Easter! :3

Other than the fact that I got virtually no work done, Easter was good this year :D And, I love this song woohoo!

I like it when people say 'thank you'

You get that warm fuzzy feeling, yknow? Keeps you smiling :)

Disastrously-addictive song alert!

Second post today!
But good grief this song has been playing over and over and over in my head :O

Can I have an egg omelette?

Firstly, the title for this post has nothing to do with its content :D

Sigh. I think the tired bug is coming back again. It seems like no matter how much I sleep now I'm still tired. You have no idea how hard it was to pay attention during Math lecture today. My eyelids and I are at some sort of perpetual war with each other ;__;

My rashes are getting from bad to worse. I have no idea how/when I got it though. Maybe it was at FD2? All I ate was carrot cake with prawns, but I didn't even touch the prawns! Anyway I'm getting really irritated by it. Doesn't help that the rash cream Dr Goh gave me has run out.

The acoustic set today was awesome :) At least when I was there it was. Vincent and Landy did a Jason Mraz. I think that has become the defacto first-impression guitar song. I used to always think it was More than Words; I really love that song. Hey, I should go listen to it now. Mr Yit and Mr Hu were awesome as well; especially Mr Hu; never knew he could sing! Lol. And Landy the #o1 tan-nist 'imparted' some tanning tips. I'm so disgusted at the blotches on my face now, seriously. We should go try out artificial tanning someday! It's be something new and exciting. Ooh, I love experimenting with new stuff :D

After the set MT and I went to pray; it was our turn for the prayer chain. It was really good today :) It's like the prayer practically composed itself. There were no pauses or anything; it seemed like we had lots to pray for today and lots to thank God for. You know, people are always starting their prayer with 'I pray that..., I also pray that...' It's like we're always asking? I think it's really nice and necessary to give thanks, too. I always make it a point to start my prayer with a thanks. Something Mommy taught me from young I suppose!

Oh, I'm really hgfoiguguwgug about losing my water bottle though. I loved my beautiful green nalgene bottle! I was drinking from it while watching the acoustic set, then I went to pray, then when I returned for it, POOF IT IS GONEZZZ. Gahh. I was still planning to pump water into my stomach since I'm penniless.. I still haven't figured why I'm so broke this week!! Will someone please explain it to me? Sigh. Oh crap there's life con shirt to pay for. D":

Okay I am going to read though some notes now or something. I really need to, like. Buck up.
Adios!

Rest assured you're in my prayers :D

Prayer is a powerful tool.

1. Thank You for today, from my waking up to keeping me safe as I go home
2. Prayer for the sick: Sammie, Victor, WenQian, my rashes (?!)
3. Life Con people may God guide you to run and help you to never grow weary
4. Bless our relationships
5. Guidance and faith for tomorrow :)

: )

This is gonna be really short!

I'm glad I went yesterday for FD2.
I got the answer I was looking for, and I got his promise.
That he'll always be walking with me and encouraging me, simply with his presence.
And now I know, everything's gonna be okay : )

God, can you hear me?

After praying last night and as I was on the verge of sleeping, I had a sudden eureka. It just.. came. A verse. Used my phone light to grope around the alter next to my bed for my bible, took an awfully long time with the severe lack of light, and finally arrived at Isaiah 43:2. And it was really apt and something I could relate to easily, with life being the way it is now.

Honestly, this has been a really, really nasty week and Audrey is almost reaching her limit.
Results are back ('disappointment' would be a severe understatement), relationships are getting strained, expectations are not being met.

When I got Math back, I was totally at a lost. How was I going to break this to my parents? It didn't help that I do have help for Math, which is why my grade is simply not justified. How was I going to answer to them? In the evening I had a little.. dispute with my dad. Okay, it wasn't exactly 'little'; in fact it made me feel really guilty. Especially with the family problems going on now. I already got into this whole mess before, um, 'informing' them about my Math grade. I think they would kick me out of the house if they found out.

Hoped today would be better, but I guess not. Got back Chem and again, expectations were not met. I was really down about the fact that despite having studied for it, I still didn't do well. But I was more concerned about letting people down. Again. I mean, that's my personal definition of 'fulfillment': to meet people's expectations. (Which, may I add, is really ironic. I always seem to be letting people down. I never seem to do anything right.) I felt really guilty, and how I was going to tell Gerard. Really, I think he has been very kind to render help whenever I am in doubt. He's always saying, ' If you have any questions you can ask me yeah?' And thanks to him, I've been scoring A's for all my chem tests so far. I had questions the night before h1 papers and he took time off to explain, despite not having studied for Economics. But the fact is that I screwed up Chem BT1. Emmanuel, Victoria is sorry k?

I tell people to have faith in God's plan, yet as usual, I'm not practicing what I preach. I cannot; I tried, really, but I just cannot see myself leaving it all to God. I cannot commit everything to him. I cannot trust that he'll make everything okay. Really, I think my faith is, for the lack of the ability to come up with something coherent at this point, as puny as an ant. I know faith is believing without seeing, but I just can't do that. I'm like Thomas; unless I can put my hands through his side, I won't believe. I need that event. I need that something that is so tangible I have no choice but to believe.

" When you pass through deep waters,
I will be with you,
Your troubles will not overwhelm you"
.isaiah43.2.

I have been very intrigued lately.

Dichotomy vs Trichotomy

On a happier note,

This is why Loh's email is what it is.

"legazevu says:
cherrmichealrao = the name of my bass guitar.

legazevu says:
ok initially it was named micheal, spelt wrongly when i was younger, when i went to buy my bass guitar

legazevu says:
it was micheal because... i was a guy and i assumed the guitar i bought would also be a guy. hence the first male name that came to my mind

legazevu says:
next, after using my bass for a while, i realized my constant action of plugging in the cable jack kinda made it a girl, hence, the first female name that was the top of my mind, Cherry

legazevu says:
lastly, rao. since none of my first 2 assumptions on my guitar's sex really made any sense, i figured it was neither guy nor girl. hence using my gay teacher's name, from cat high, rao. "

I am laughing. (:

(terribly) pensive.

For those who know why;
Brens, Rachel,

I want to go back to Thailand.

All the way back to Chiangmai
Just for one more night under the stars.

" Let Go, Let God"

Sometimes we ask God to help us with something, but we are unwilling to let go and let him take care of it, even though it was us who requested for his help in the first place. Many times we stand at his side as he tries to fix our problem and when we get irritated and impatient at the pace at which he works (sometimes it takes awhile), we try to interfere because we think, with our disgusting human pride, that we can handle the problem ourselves. Maybe we should leave it in his hands because, regardless of how long he'll take, at least we have the assurance that the problem will be well-taken care of in the end. In the grand scheme of things, only he knows what's best for us, his precious children.

With this, I commit myself to you, Lord. Together I lift up my family, my friends. Their troubles, fears, insecurities. Only you can grant us this peace we seek for.

" He will protect you as you come and go, now and forever," [psalms 121:8]

This is easily one of my favorite bible verses. It's apt in any and every context.

It is not my duty to love God.
It is not my duty to go to heaven.

Instead,
It is a joy to love God, and
Heaven is his gift to me.

Just thought that what Father Goh said at mass today was quite meaningful. ^__^